But very quickly, the bird of optimism gets shot down by the rifle of reality.
In just this past week I have had:
-1 student suspended for coming to school high
-1 student seek me out for guidance in dealing with childhood sexual abuse
-1 student miss our morning appointment because "something came up on the streets and he had to help,"
WHAT?!
14-16 year olds, having to live in conditions that I can neither understand nor relate to, asking questions that I've only ever heard in a theoretical sense.
Suddenly, the urgency of what it is that we are doing here, all came flooding back to me. The education that we are providing is these kid's "golden ticket" out of here.
Willie Wonka took a full movie to get 1 kid successfully through his Chocolate Factory, we are taking four years to get approximately 280 through ours. The process is too slow. Shouldn't we be focusing on making the inner city the "chocolate factory" instead of trying to find one to ship our youth to?
Subsequently, I'm beginning to ask, is MATCH (and other charter schools like it) really doing anything to address the systemic problem of urban environments? My students now have better MCAS scores, but they still take dangerous routes home. We protect them for 8, 10, even 12 hours a day, but the reality is that we can't protect them from all of it. With a goal of college success and beyond, we focus on the future of where the kid is going, rather than the future of where the kid is now. My school recruits students from all over Boston, people who literally travel 1-2 hours each way to get here. It is nearly impossible to build a sense of community outside of the students--to involve parents and organizations, because the logistics in getting here are SO ridiculous. That's one of the downfalls of the charter school model, anyone can apply, anyone can get accepted, and suddenly the demographic of students that the school supports spreads an entire metropolis.
These three instances of drugs, sex, and violence have re-invigorated and re-affirmed my mission toward public schools. We neither have the time, energy, nor resources to make a bunch of chocolate factories. We have got to "start where we are, use what we've got, and do what we can." We have to invest in the public institutions that already exist. There's no sense in re-inventing the wheel, we just need to patch the holes and get a pump.
Mitch, what you describe mirrors my experience with students this last week and I work in rural Iowa. No child is immune, nor is any school district, public or charter, and as a teacher you are left feeling like, "How can I teach this kid to read when their very basic needs of safety are an illusion?" It's easy to feel defeated, and all new teachers do. This is the side of education no one wants to put on a political commercial. It's easy to beat the drum for better education, but it's difficult to hold those kids hands as they negotiate the issues in their daily lives. It is sacred work for those who can do it. Your classroom may be the only predictable event in that kid's life, the only time when he knows exactly where he stands and that can be a tremendous support. I've done this for close to 20 years and it always shocks me when past students say, "I remember when you said..." You will never know what good you do, some days by just showing up and pointing out the good in them (and some days even that is hard :)because many kids will fight you on it. In their world, if people give them a compliment, it means they are being manipulated. The only thing that breaks through is not giving up and being consistent. I admire your passion.
ReplyDeleteChris Wulf (Dallas' mom)